Eulogy for James Ratcliffe
March 22, 1985 - June 6, 2005

By: Peter H. Ratcliffe, Father
Delivered at Civic Funeral for James
Hudson, Quebec Saturday June 11, 2005

Pulling onto Selkirk after midnight Monday, I wondered if it would be easier to live in a place where you knew no one and could crawl into a hole to lick your wounds alone. But Hudson is so much better than letting us do that. Friends who shared our loss immediately surrounded us and haven’t stopped. A never-ending stream of help, friendship, food, love, hugs and support has flowed into this gaping wound. This compassionate loving way that Hudson has about it is just one of the reasons why Hudson is a great place to live and raise families.

James Ratcliffe was ripped from our hearts in an instant, as he died suddenly in the noble service of others. He was surrounded by firefighters he loved as his best and most trusted friends. He was in a place he loved and served. He was doing the thing he most loved doing, being a firefighter. Accidents happen for no apparent reason, but James lived his life with and for reason and died as a hero in the service of the public good.

Speaking for my family, there is deep sadness and hurt in our hearts, but no anger or regret. When James went into the water Monday night his fate was sealed by a tragic accident. Moving faster, getting him to shore and hospital sooner would not have changed anything. The noble men and women of the Hudson Firefighters did everything they could to save one of their own, but from first impact it was already impossible. I want us all to help the firefighters, ambulance staff, and community patrol find peace soon and remove the weight of James’ death from their shoulders and hearts. It is not their fault. They bear no responsibility, accidents happen for unexplainable reasons and this was simply a tragic accident. James would want you to learn and become better, taking whatever you can learn from this. But James knew he was at risk and accepted that there might be grave consequences while he was helping serve and protect the community. That’s what makes firefighters great and noble people, ignoring risk to help others. Hudson firefighters are great and noble people who are hurting and deserve our support and respect.

James was a gifted student, with great hair, who excelled in everything he did. Always aiming high, he achieved excellence at many things. He worked hard daily to develop his unlimited potential for greatness, so it is fitting that today we celebrate and honor a hero’s life.

James’ academic achievements and awards are well documented, his sports and committee work, his Avon Scholarship, his straight A’s were always the example other parents used for their children. He expected those of himself and amazed Diane and me at how high he reached and how hard he pushed. He had his own vision of excellence for himself and worked daily towards it, always happy, positive and smiling.

James had a huge capacity for love and compassion throughout his short life. He loved his parents and sister and girlfriend without limit, but with his energy and compassion he loved and touched thousands of others as well. Our family said “I Love You” to each other constantly and meant it, but more importantly we showed it in actions every day of our lives. It’s not enough to just say it, you need to earn that right, and James loved us every day as we loved him.

James was extremely moral and ethical, holding himself and his friends to the highest standards. I believe that three things drew James to firefighting. The desire to serve and protect was foremost in his mind, it was a way to give back to his community. Secondly, he found a great group of like-minded every day heroes to work with and got to play with the big-boy toys, drive around on fire trucks and use the Chateau as the un-official clubhouse. The third reason is of course that chicks find firefighters hot. From what I’ve heard, chicks found James hot before he became a firefighter. An informal poll of the young women I’ve talked to this week shows 90% with “I Love James Ratcliffe” somewhere in their diary and 10% to shy to admit it.

Hundreds of us have a gaping wound from the loss of James. We will never completely heal this terrible loss. We should understand that we will never forget the pain we feel now, only learn to live with it and slowly accept it as a new normal. We will bandage the wound so we don’t see it, but we’ll always feel it. From time to time it will become infected and fester causing greater pain, and we will have to work again to heal it over and over, again and again. We should chose to let the pain of that wound remind us that we can be better at our own lives. We will need to work for better like James worked and that pain will make us stronger.

James felt he would change the world for the better, and perhaps he has already. His death has allowed a community to show boundless love in a time of darkness and confusion. We can honour James every day of our futures by being more like him in every way. If each of you improves some small weakness in the name of James each day, the world will rapidly become an even more special place that James would have loved even more.

James loved Hudson. James has showed the world that Hudson is a better place now, so perhaps he did achieve his dream of changing the world. Through the media, the rest of the world has seen how model communities should act in a crisis. Compassion, strength and help have poured from every corner of this small community, which is exactly what should happen everywhere, but often doesn’t. We have been surrounded by love, hugs and kisses with our every need and want provided to help us heal. We do it better here in Hudson because we love our community and each and every soul here, and we’re not too shy to say it or show it. This wonderful community makes great kids into great citizens, and James Ratcliffe was a great citizen of a great community.

James wanted to live forever here and he will in our hearts, our minds, and as a shining example of what youth and ambition combined with hard work can accomplish when planted and nurtured in the right garden.
James loved Hudson for all the good he found here, for all he accomplished he was one of the good guys you find here.

My message to all parents and children is important. James, Jessica, Diane and myself always communicate openly. Issues are resolved without anger. Anger gets in the way of growth, so decide which fights are important. We try to resolve differences by the end of the conversation. We talk about anything as equals with respect and reason. Every subject is open for discussion. We don’t leave things unsaid or hanging. We hug each other and most of all say “I Love You” as often as we can. We mean those words and feel each other’s love constantly.

The single greatest comfort I can find in James’ sudden death is that everything was said and we had no anger or arguments in process. There were no outstanding or unresolved issues, nothing left unsaid. We resolved arguments before leaving the room. We knew we loved and respected each other absolutely. When James smiled and left for practice the only things in our relationship were the great love and respect we shared for each other.

I urge every parent and child to constantly find the middle ground and accept and love each other unconditionally. Never slam the door and leave with an argument unfinished, don’t hang up the phone suddenly. A sudden tragedy could make that argument your last memory.

We learned this week that an instant can take a great life away, and our memories of James are all happy and positive. Make sure in your families, that each day's issues are fairly resolved, hug your children and parents and speak of your love. Treat this and every day as if it might be your last and you will never go wrong.

Live like James lived and each of you change the world for the better. James loved you all and we all loved James. We will remember James forever.

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